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<\/a><\/b><\/p>\n*name has been changed to protect privacy<\/p>\n
After teaching children with severe learning and behavior issues for eight years, I was in need of a change. A first grade position opened up in the district, so I applied and thankfully was offered the position. I instantly adored my team of first grade teachers. In exchange for grade level supplies and curriculum guidance, I offered effective behavioral strategies for the most challenging students in our grade level. And on extremely trying days, I would even accept visitors from other first grade classrooms.<\/p>\n
Gregory* was one of my frequent visitors. My students and I always knew when Gregory would be coming. We could hear his problem escalating, and then there he would be standing at our door with the work he was refusing to do in hand.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Since I had thirty students of my own to contend with, I didn\u2019t say much to Gregory. He went straight to his spot at a table in the back of the room. He knew what he was expected to do. With his mess of brown curls and bright green eyes, the beautiful little boy pushed away his chair and fidgeted as he worked.\u00a0 Although his approach was unconventional, his work was always accurate. And when he was finished with his assignments, he would draw motorcycles on the back of his paper until someone from his classroom came for him. Sometimes Gregory was with us until pre-dismissal clean up. When I instructed my class to pick up at least 10 items off the floor (with one being the \u201cprize-worthy\u201d piece of trash) Gregory would always pick up 20.<\/p>\n
At the end of first semester, Gregory\u2019s teacher, who was an exemplary educator, said she had a proposition for me to consider. She informed me that Gregory\u2019s mother was hoping he could become a permanent student in my class. Gregory also wanted this. I could tell the teacher felt very badly that she was not able to meet his needs, so I quickly told her not to worry. I would be happy to have Gregory as my student. The principal of the school approved this unusual arrangement and after holiday break, Gregory was officially part of my class.<\/p>\n
On his first day in my classroom, Gregory arrived shortly after the bell rang. He stood at the door just like he used to when he was sent over due to disruptive behavior. The class was busy completing their morning work, so I got up and walked out to meet him.<\/p>\n
Although I didn\u2019t know what was going to come out of my mouth, this mini-lecture ended up being one I\u2019ll never forget.<\/p>\n
\u201cGregory, I am very glad that you are going to be my student, but I want to make sure you understand three things about my classroom.\u201d I held out three fingers, at which he stared a little too intently.<\/p>\n
\u201cOne, the students in this classroom do their work when they are told to do it. Two, the students in this classroom listen to me and when they raise their hand, I listen to them. And three, the members of this classroom always, ALWAYS, treat each other with kindness and respect.\u201d<\/p>\n
Gregory\u2019s eyes now held the look of surprise, as if he didn\u2019t expect these ground rules. I definitely had his attention.<\/p>\n
\u201cThis means that in my classroom, there is no yelling. There is no defiant behavior. There are no refusals. There is no cussing or nasty talk. So if you are planning on doing any of these things, you may as well find another classroom. That kind of behavior is not welcome here. However<\/em>, if you are willing to do your work, listen, and be kind to others, then I welcome you to be a part of our classroom family.\u201d<\/p>\n Then I kneeled down and looked directly into his bright eyes\u2014he was about to hear the best part of all. \u201cYou see, I am a believer in second chances, Gregory. And today you are being given a chance to start over, start fresh, and be the person I know and you know<\/i> you can be. The choice is yours, Gregory. Would you like to be a part of our classroom?\u201d<\/p>\n Gregory, whose eyes were now as wide as saucers, swallowed a huge lump in his throat. \u201cYes, Ma\u2019am,\u201d he managed to squeak out.<\/p>\n \u201cOkay then, let\u2019s go meet your classmates.\u201d I smiled and motioned him to follow me through the door.\u00a0 As we entered, a quiet hush fell over the classroom. Gregory looked down at his shoes in embarrassment.\u00a0I gently put my arm around his shoulders and addressed the class. \u201cEveryone, Gregory is the newest member of our classroom family! I would love to tell you a few things that I bet you don\u2019t know about him.\u201d<\/p>\n My new curly-haired student nervously glanced up, wondering where I was going with this. I squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. \u201cGregory is a wonderful speller. If you get stuck on a word, ask Gregory. In fact, I might even need your spelling help once in awhile. Would that be okay?\u201d I asked with a wink.<\/p>\n The class looked confused. Surely, I wasn\u2019t talking about that<\/i> Gregory. Even Gregory looked down at himself to make sure I was referring to him.\u00a0With enthusiasm I continued sharing more positive attributes about our newest member. \u201cGregory loves motorcycles. Some of the best drawings I have ever seen have been by Gregory. I am sure he would love to show you at recess.\u201d<\/p>\n Gregory\u2019s head was no longer weighed down like a dejected rag doll. He was making eye contact with the children who were now smiling brightly at him.<\/p>\n \u201cAnd finally class, I must tell you, Gregory is a super cleaner. I have many super cleaners in this room, but now the bar has been raised. I am pretty sure I will have the cleanest room in the whole school every day at 2:35!\u201d<\/p>\n Gregory looked up at me with full-on disbelief. I whispered, “Second chances,”<\/em> as if it were our secret code. The most hopeful smile came across Gregory\u2019s as he fully realized what was being offered at that moment.<\/p>\n Michael\u2019s* elated voice pierced the silence in the room like candy falling from a pi\u00f1ata. \u00a0\u201cGregory! You get to sit next to me!\u201d He vigorously patted the empty desk next to him.<\/p>\n Gregory\u2019s eyes darted to the back of the room where he used to sit when he was a visitor. He looked uncertain of his place.<\/p>\n \u201cCome on, Gregory!\u201d Michael impatiently beckoned. It was then that Gregory spotted his pristine nameplate on the empty desk next to Michael. Seeing his name written in lovingly-formed penmanship seemed to convince him that there was, indeed, a place for him.<\/p>\n Once seated, Gregory noticed all the children had their notebooks out, so he quickly opened his and got right to work.<\/p>\n Gregory worked hard that day. He responded kindly to the children. He raised his hand and offered meaningful contributions to our discussions. He helped a student who was struggling with two-digit subtraction.<\/p>\n I wrote a special note to his mother explaining all the wonderful things Gregory had done that day. As he carefully tucked the note into his take-home folder, he couldn\u2019t contain his excitement. With a smile that showed almost every tooth in his mouth, Gregory admitted, \u201cMy mom isn\u2019t used to getting good notes.\u201d<\/p>\n The rest of the week was equally good, but I was not na\u00efve. I had worked with many challenging students who had a \u201choneymoon period\u201d of positive behavior before any issues presented themselves. I braced myself for the day things fell apart. But that day never came. When I detected hints of misbehavior creeping up, I would give Gregory a look. He knew what I expected of him. He knew I believed in his abilities.<\/p>\n The second semester passed quickly. Before we knew it, the last day of school arrived. The children and I were saying our goodbyes. Gregory, who was not much for physical contact, came up behind me and unexpectedly hugged me. \u201cThank you for giving me a second chance,\u201d he murmured into my back.<\/p>\n I turned around and looked straight into his eyes that were suddenly so full of promise and said, \u201cIt wasn\u2019t me, Gregory. You gave YOURSELF a second chance.\u201d<\/p>\n Although the following school year I was home with my new baby, I followed up on Gregory often. Much to my delight, his teacher reported he was doing well\u2014one of her top students. And now, nine years later, I really wish I could see all the great things Gregory is doing. Most of all, I wish I could thank him.<\/p>\n Because of him, I give my children a fresh start each morning despite poor choices and bad attitudes the day before.<\/p>\n Because of him, I offer myself a do-over even when I fall short of being the parent and person I want to be.<\/p>\n Because of him, I strive to look for the positives in a person despite preconceived notions or past \u201creputation.\u201d<\/p>\n Because of him, I have come to believe that one\u2019s past does not have to determine one\u2019s future.<\/p>\n Because the chance at a new beginning may appear more ordinary than we think.\u00a0It can be as simple as seeing one\u2019s name without any marks surrounding it … or being introduced to others in a positive light … or accepting a knowing smile that says, \u201cI\u2019ve made mistakes before, too.\u201d<\/p>\n I believe second chances come in the form of an outstretched hand. Because when someone loses his way, we have the power to point out there is still a place for him\u2014a place where he can shine his light again.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n ***************************************************<\/p>\n Do you know someone (little or big) who has lost his\/her way? Perhaps the notion of a fresh start through an accepting smile, an outstretched hand, or an \u201cI know you can turn this around\u201d pep talk is timely.\u00a0 Although I offered other former students second chances and was left disappointed, I never regretted trying. I believe that just knowing someone else feels you are worthy of a second chance is the kind of thing that sticks with a person. You never know when he or she will decide to believe it and make a positive change. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n