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I am a walker. My mom instilled the walking routine in me starting in grade school, and ever since then, it has been my therapy. Whether as a high school student, a special education teacher, a pregnant mother, or a fulltime author, I walk away my troubles; I walk towards peace.<\/p>\n
As my daughters grew, I began to invite them on my daily walks. Mostly their answers have been no.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t quit asking<\/em>,\u201d my heart advised.<\/p>\n Finally, it happened. Not only did one of my children say yes, but she began inviting me to go.<\/p>\n \u201cWill you walk with me tonight?\u201d my 14-year-old began asking a few months ago. Her requests usually come after 8pm, when the temperatures have fallen, but there is no way I would say no.<\/p>\n Over the holiday break, our walks together were especially significant. My family met my parents and my sister on the South Carolina coast where we have celebrated many Christmases. Since high school, I\u2019ve been walking this particular strip of beach and paved biking paths alone. This time, I relished the fact that daughter walked beside me. Time passed quickly as she talked about her thirst to travel the world, her plan for making money this summer, her expectations for high school next year, her New Year\u2019s Eve plans, and cats \u2026 we always talked about our cats.<\/p>\n When it got quiet, she\u2019d say, \u201cTell me a story.\u201d<\/p>\n One day I told her the story of the stranded alligator I spotted when I was at the beach in the fall. He was quite small and couldn\u2019t seem to escape the waves that continually battered him.<\/p>\n I\u2019ll never forget standing there with tears in my eyes not knowing what to do.<\/p>\n All I knew was I could not walk by.<\/p>\n I decided to stop a passerby to show her the troubling scene. The woman was also concerned and not sure what to do.<\/p>\n She unexpectedly looked down and asked about the little notebook in my hand. When I said I was an author whose best ideas come during my walks, the woman asked me about my books.<\/p>\n Feeling unexpectedly comfortable with her, I shared more than usual. \u201cMy books are about being fully present in life so you notice opportunities to love and be loved, even when it's difficult, inconvenient, or painful\u2014kind-of like noticing struggling baby alligators and trying to help them,\u201d I laughed, but I wasn\u2019t really joking.<\/p>\n \u201cTo notice and respond with love,\u201d the woman repeated.<\/p>\n Sensing she was open for further expansion, I said, \u201cI believe it's the opportunities we miss or walk by that create pain, turmoil, and regret in our lives. It is when we notice and respond with love that we bring peace and purpose to our lives.\u201d<\/p>\n It\u2019s how I knew I must help the alligator.<\/p>\n The woman went on her way and I consulted with a few more beach walkers. Finally, I took matters into my own hands and called the Department of Natural Resources. I spoke to a man named Mark who assured me the alligator could survive a few days in the ocean. He explained that they go in to get parasites off.<\/p>\n \u201cDon't worry, he\u2019ll be ok,\u201d I remember Mark saying assuredly.<\/p>\n \u201cMom, only you would try to save an alligator,\u201d my daughter laughed, bringing me back from my reverie.<\/p>\n \u201cI haven\u2019t always been that way,\u201d I admitted, not feeling compelled to explain what I meant. \u201cI like this version of me better,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n \u201cI know,\u201d she said quietly, but there was love in her voice. And there was love between us as we walked back to our rental, looking out into the water for something in need of saving.<\/p>\n That night in the condo I showed my dad one of the videos from my upcoming online course, SOUL SHIFT<\/a><\/em>. Each week, participants will receive a video of me sharing a painful truth from my life that was a catalyst for positive change. I believe this works because in order to get to the fears preventing us from truly living and loving, we have to first tap into some very hard truths about ourselves. In response to each truth, rather than pushing the pain and discomfort away, I allowed it to lead me, enlighten me, improve me. This became a process that changed my life.<\/p>\n In this particular video, I was describing a painful truth that was triggered by a heartbreaking experience with Natalie when she was six. Upon hearing her name in the video, Natalie came over and began watching. After a few minutes, she pulled up a chair, transfixed by her mother\u2019s raw emotions and hope-filled words.<\/p>\n I was describing the pain I saw in her \u2013 pain that I\u2019d caused \u2013 and how my response to that pain led to real, positive, lasting change in my life. It would have been easier to walk by the pain I saw in my child.<\/p>\n It would have been easier to deny my part in it.<\/p>\n It would have been easier to deny change was needed.<\/p>\n But I didn\u2019t take the easy path.<\/p>\n I knelt down and acknowledged the pain.<\/p>\n I didn\u2019t know if I could heal the pain, but I knew I could not walk by.<\/p>\n This solitary decision to stop and respond to my inner-most painful truth was what led me on a path of joy and fulfillment, resulting in better version of myself.<\/p>\n I am not the same person I was when I caused my daughter pain and anguish.<\/p>\n That person would not have stopped to save an alligator.<\/p>\n I would have weighed the pros and cons before taking action. I would have determined if I had the time \u2026 if I wanted the hassle \u2026 if I could take the rejection or judgment I might receive for stepping in, revealing my tender heart, and admitting my fears.<\/p>\n So often I forfeited opportunities to love and be loved. So often I\u2019d let shallow reasons detract me from finding my peace and purpose. I am different now; now I know the purpose of my life is to not walk by.<\/p>\n Hopeless, messy, lost, and hurting self,<\/em> I won\u2019t walk by.<\/p>\n And now, seven years later, I know the significance of one loving response to a scene of pain and struggle. One loving response can transform a life.<\/p>\n Person crying in the pat-down screening area of the airport, I won't walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n Person grouchy, prickly, and sullen sitting at my kitchen table, I won't walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n Person cloaked in depression pulling out trashcans in the neighboring driveway, I won't walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n Person nervously fidgeting, begging to be seen, I won't walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n Person sitting alone in the nursing home day after day, I won\u2019t walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n Person being ridiculed at the bus stop, I won't walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n Person cleaning the restroom feeling invisible, I won\u2019t walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n Person speaking up with a shaking voice, I won\u2019t walk by.<\/em><\/p>\n In you, I see my most vulnerable self. And when I attend to you, I attend to me.<\/p>\n Person with weary eyes and a hopeful heart staring back at me<\/em>, I won\u2019t walk by.<\/p>\n In a world that looks for the quick fix \u2026 that prefers to numb the pain \u2026 that has no time to waste \u2026 where lives are overscheduled and minds are distracted, we opt for the easy route. But\u00a0then we forfeit the chance to better ourselves and better the world through a single loving response.<\/p>\n No creature too small, Perhaps you sit here today contemplating another daunting New Year's Resolution. I hope what you have read encourages you to consider a New-Year Response<\/em> instead. Instantly, the path to becoming a better version of you is not so elusive:<\/p>\n Don\u2019t walk by yourself anymore \u2026<\/em> Don\u2019t walk by yourself anymore \u2026<\/em> ******************************************************************<\/p>\n Dear friends, to kick off the new year I have created a free eBook for you called: The Positivity Remedy: 6 Strategies to Heal Your Home and Revive Your Heart in 2018<\/em><\/a>. The stories and small-step strategies I share in this book have the potential to soften your inner and outer voice, change your perspective, and repair broken bonds. The strategies in this book can lead to a happier home where people can breathe and thrive. The tools in this book provide what I believe is most vital to creating a positive home \u2013 and that is hope, hope in who you already are and hope for who you can become. Click here<\/a> to get The Positivity Remedy.<\/strong><\/p>\n Registration opens next week for my online course, SOUL SHIFT<\/em><\/a>! Click here to ensure you don\u2019t miss the sign up or the early-bird pricing. I believe <\/strong>it is NEVER TOO LATE to live the life you want to live or be the person or parent you want to be. Your most painful truths can be a catalyst for change. The tools, accountability, and support you will receive throughout this 8-week journey will facilitate one of life\u2019s hardest, but greatest opportunities: figuring out how to make positive, lasting change in your life and relationships, for good. Click here<\/a> to join the <\/strong>SOUL SHIFT<\/em><\/strong> waitlist. <\/strong><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.handsfreemama.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/IMG_4702-656x600.jpg\")
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<\/p>\nIt was in that initial choice to stop for my daughter\u2019s pain that I actually stopped for myself.<\/h3>\n
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<\/p>\nI won\u2019t walk by because I am you\u2014lost, hopeless, scared, insecure, and hurting sometimes too.<\/h3>\n
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\nNo issue too complicated,
\nNo damage too severe,
\nNo time too passed,
\nNo connection too broken.<\/p>\nI won\u2019t walk by.<\/h3>\n
\n Hopeless, bruised, lost, and hurting<\/em>
\n You are worth stopping for,<\/em>
\n You are worth saving.<\/em><\/p>\n
\n I am here, take my hand.<\/em>
\n We\u2019ll walk together, side by side,<\/em>
\n Training ourselves to stop for pain and suffering.<\/em><\/p>\nThis is how we\u2019ll heal the world.
\nAnd find our peace and purpose in the process.<\/h3>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.handsfreemama.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/DSC_0017-1-734x600.jpg\")
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