“With arms outstretched I thank.
With heart beating gratefully I love.
With body in health I jump for joy.
With spirit full I live.”
~Terri Guillemets
I honestly could not remember seeing my child this excited about something in her whole life. She exploded off the school bus gripping the American Heart Association Jump Rope for Heart information sheet in her hand and never let it out of her sight. She studied it while eating a snack. She kept it right beside her while she did her homework. She read over it multiple times while I made dinner as if she’d be tested on it.
“Every $50 we earn can help a child with a heart problem,” she explained to me during a rare glance up from the paper. “If we earn $5, we get Splatter. He’s the duck with the paint splotches. And I really want to earn Sky Dude. See him, Mama?” Avery pointed to a green duck wearing an orange helmet. “I am going to ask people to sponsor me. Then I am going to practice jumping.”
My daughter ran off to get started on her plan, nearly forgetting her colorful brochure—but not quite. When she ran back and snatched it up like a rare diamond, the oddest statement came to my head.
“I want to get excited about ducks.”
I trudged up to Avery’s room where she was supposed to be picking out a book to read for bedtime. Instead she was studying a small dish filled with colorful rocks. She had the neck of the bendable light shining directly down on her collection. She was investigating each one like a true geologist.
“Do you think this a piece of chalk or a rock?” she posed with a giggle. I could tell it was a trick question, so I played along.
“It sure looks like chalk to me,” I replied.
“Nope! It’s a rock!” Avery then proceeded to tell me how she was going to take a few rocks to school tomorrow to show her teacher and classmates.
As she described noteworthy qualities about each colorful stone, a thought I’d never had in my life came to me. “I want to get excited about rocks.”
First it was ducks then it was rocks. I had no idea where this coming from.
The next morning Avery bounded down the stairs fully dressed and ready for breakfast. She was clutching the Jump Rope for Heart paper in one hand and her rock collection in the other. It was 6:35 a.m. and she was smiling the way people do when they are sailing away on a tropical cruise. I found her pre-dawn cheerfulness slightly irritating.
“Listen, Mama,” she instructed looking deliriously happy. “Sally, seashell, supper, silver.”
I looked at her cluelessly. It was much too early for word riddles.
“I can say my S’s now even with the appliance in my mouth!” Avery explained. Then she cheered a hearty “yes!” accompanied by a fist pump. She actually fist pumped and it was still dark outside.
There I stood in my mismatched pajamas and mismatched socks holding a plate of eggs made the way I always make them thinking, “I want to get excited about S’s too.”
Although it was painful to admit, I couldn’t remember the last time I felt excited … like bursting-at-the-seams excited … like wearing-pure-joy-on-my-face excited. Truthfully, I was in a slump. My heart felt like it was only half beating. My view of the world looked colorless. Should I consider medication? Meditation? Vacation? What’s wrong with me? I wondered.
All day I thought about my lack of excitement, my missing enthusiasm, my going-through-the-motions existence. I’d just started a 21-Day Choose Love Challenge. I’d vowed to choose love as my response in times of anger, frustration, distraction, and overwhelm, but suddenly I also wanted to Choose to Love Life More. I wanted to get excited about unexpected triumphs and everyday blessings the way my eight-year-old daughter did. But was such an aspiration unachievable? I wondered. Maybe this is just what happens when you get older. After all, very little is new and fresh anymore. My days are redundant; my schedule is predictable. Perhaps only children can get excited about plastic ducks, shiny rocks, and correctly pronounced words. I had no answers, but I felt slightly more hopeful because I was asking questions—even ones that hurt.
Avery got off the bus that afternoon with three little plastic ducks joyfully swinging from her neck. By the look on her face, it was Christmas in February. She merrily informed me that she had to practice jumping rope as soon as she got home.
I sat on the driveway bundled up from head to toe while my coatless child demonstrated several variations of jump roping despite the bitter wind. I couldn’t help but notice the way the plastic ducks danced on her chest with every hop. As Avery got into a rhythm, the ducks literally came to life.
“May I try?” I blurted out of nowhere.
Avery looked thrilled by my request and handed me the rope.
I hadn’t expected to twirl the rope multiple times without tripping. I hadn’t expected it to actually be fun. I hadn’t expected Avery to smile so brightly at the sight of her mama jumping rope.
“Wow! You’re pretty good, Mama!” she said with a blend of shock and delight on her face.
Between the sunshine, her smile, and the movement of my stiff body, I felt a little better. I felt a little pulse coming back to my lifeless veins.
A few hours later Avery asked if she could set up a “spa” to pamper me. I thought about saying it was too late. I was tired and just wanted to put her to bed. But those ducks hanging around her neck seemed to beckon me with their animated eyes.
After agreeing to her offer, my child promptly filled a shallow container with warm, soapy water. She lovingly caressed my feet while the ducks hung suspended over the water as if they were flying. Avery patted my feet dry and soothed fragrant lotion into my thirsty winter skin.
I hadn’t expected her to be so good at massaging my feet. I hadn’t expected it to feel this soothing. Between her soft little hands, the tranquility of the water, and our loving connection, I felt a little better. I felt a little life awakening in my sleeping bones.
The next afternoon was Avery’s swim team practice day. She’d just finished up dryland training, which is the conditioning portion of practice that involves running and calisthenics.
“Want me to show you where our team runs when we go outside?” Avery asked eagerly.
I really wanted to get home. I needed to start dinner. But the ducks—the ducks got me again. They seemed to whisper, “Say yes.”
“Okay,” I spit out reluctantly.
“Follow my path,” Avery called out looking back at me with an encouraging smile. Something told me those were words to remember.
Avery and I ran for seven solid minutes. We ran up concrete stairs, around bends, and down hilly inclines. She was grinning the whole time—this little girl who really doesn’t like to run was grinning and running. And the ducks were dancing against her heart.
“No walking, Mama,” she coached when I began to slow my pace. “Gotta get your heart rate up!”
My heart rate was up. Oh, how my heart was beating. Between the encouragement of my mini trainer and the sight of my warm breath hitting the cold air, I caught a glimpse of color in my colorless world. A little spark of life tingled in my extremities.
Follow my path. Those words stuck with me. A few days later, their importance was revealed.
It was Day Seven of the Choose Love Challenge. I’d taken my daughters and their friend to a rustic park with gentle trails nestled among tall trees. It was unseasonably warm that day and after a short hike the kids asked if they could spend time building huts in the forest. They pointed down to small valley off the beaten path with a tranquil stream and an abundance of fallen tree limbs.
“Please say yes! Please say yes!” they begged.
I looked around and noticed no one else was straying from the designated trail. But I had to admit, the children were right. It was the perfect spot to build their village.
“Yes,” I said with a smile. “Let’s go.”
We scaled down the ravine together. I listened to the three companions discussing where they would set up a restaurant, town hall, and their individual huts. After an hour of planning and gathering, I could see we would be there awhile. I began my favorite activity in the whole world: walking. And because the children were in the middle of the open ravine, I was able to keep my little builders in sight.
I lost count of the number of people who stopped to watch the children and delight in their imaginative storyline. I lost count of the number of children who begged their parents to let them go off the path too. I lost count of the number of times I looked down and marveled at the joy the children were finding in dead wood and lively company.
That’s when it hit me.
As a child, nearly everything is a new path. Children feel excitement about every opportunity, every trail, and every experience because they see it through Beginner’s Eyes.
But as an adult, it becomes more difficult to encounter anything novel or unfamiliar. Daily redundancy and expected outcomes bring a lifelessness that can feel all-consuming and hopeless.
But just because you are an adult does not mean you must live a life void of excitement, passion, and joy. Just because you are no longer a beginner does not mean you can’t have Beginner’s Eyes like a child. You can. Simply go off the beaten path:
Take a different route
Accept a challenge
Learn something new
Say yes to invitations that go outside your comfort zone
Surround yourself with Livers of Life
Stop expecting and be open to the unexpected
Every time you feel that ache to feel more enthusiasm than you currently do, say something you thought you'd never say:
I want to get excited about fuzzy socks.
I want to get excited about snowflakes.
I want to get excited about bath bubbles, cereal that doesn’t get soggy, and balloons with curly, red ribbons.
I want to get excited about crunchy green apples in the dead of winter.
I want to get excited about this glorious day in front of me just waiting to be lived.
Say it and then see where it takes you.
With Beginner’s Eyes, what is lost can be found.
With Beginner’s Eyes, a lifeless heart can be resuscitated.
With Beginner’s Eyes, an uncharted path becomes available. All you have to do say YES with an open hand and heart.
(Ducks optional)
* A special thanks to Avery's amazing P.E. teacher (you know the one) who inspired Avery and the entire student body to jump! They raised $35,000 for The American Heart Association! Now that's something to get excited about!
****************************
Friends of The Hands Free Revolution, it seems like forever since we last talked. I have missed you! Please tell me how you spent the last 21 days choosing love. Tell me your triumphs. Tell me your struggles. It’s so good to be back!
One thing that never fails to excite me is meeting you, my beloved readers. I am speaking in Indiana in March and would love to see you at one of these events:
Thursday, March 12
Batesville Chamber of Commerce Speaker Series
RomWeber Marketplace Banquet Hall
7 South Eastern Avenue, Batesville
Doors open at 5:30 p.m.
My presentation begins at 6:15 p.m.
Book signing at 7 p.m.
Tickets: $20 per person includes appetizers & soft drinks
Click here for all the details.
Saturday, March 14
Grand Opening of St. Vincent’s Carmel Women’s Center
13500 N. Meridian St
Indianapolis, IN
I will be speaking from 11:30 to 12:30 p.m. with a book signing directly following
.
This is a FREE EVENT with a morning of giveaways, health screenings, pop-up boutiques, & more
Click here for all the details.
*If you have any friends in Indiana that you think might be interested in attending, I'd be grateful if you share my Events page. Thank you!
We missed you Rachel. Thanks once more.
Love from Mexico.
Thank you, Ruth. It is so heartwarming to know you are walking alongside me all the way from Mexico! I have missed hearing from my beloved readers so much the last 21 days. Your comments bring such writing fuel to my soul!
My seven year old son was absolutely fired up about those ducks too. He came home from school one day a few weeks ago talking about splatter duck and ninja duck and how he was going to get online orders and raise money. Honestly, when I saw the Jump Rope for Life form with all those plastic ducks all over it, I just sighed and thought about how the ducks were just more chotskies to add to the clutter in his room. But he kept talking about the ducks that he wanted to earn. At the kitchen table, in the car, while playing or reading, he would just all of a sudden say something duck related. So we made his online donation site and called the grandparents. He spent ten minutes describing his duck goals to Grandma over the phone. She was so impressed with his determination. And all I saw was potential clutter. The day of the jump rope even arrived and he came home with his ducks. He proudly showed Ninja and Splatter to me and told me that he still has a couple more coming in later. He lined up his ducks on his bedside table and I am sure that he is just as proud of them as his baseball and pinewood derby trophies. It’s amazing how a piece of plastic can be completely transformed by the eyes of the beholder. Thank you for reminding me to follow his lead and find joy in the simple places in life.
Thanks for sharing your own inspiring Duck story, Jennifer!
I found your website at the most perfect time — the holidays. I was so concerned with making everything perfect that I forgot about what really mattered — I just love your writing and inspiration!
Katey from South Florida, USA
I appreciate the supportive words, Katey! Thanks for being here!
Always love your writing. Always want to apply it to my life but can’t seem to get my thought geared that way once my reality hits. Wonder if you ever have bedtime struggles? That is the quickest way to ruin a weekend and make me feel like a terrible mom. My kids always argue and delay at bedtime which ends up with me yelling and them either crying pen going to bed angry. Quickest way to hate your life. Sigh.
Rhonda,
I understand the struggle. There are options, just outside of your comfort zone.
They might feel like they won’t work for you until you give it a determined effort. It’s hard to overcome the reality hit.
You’ll find the right inspiration for you, but I’ll offer my unsolicited advice if you care to hear it.
Tell them you refuse to argue anymore in a lowered voice and that bedtime is bedtime. Walk away.
If they come back or otherwise fight by not staying quiet, repeat in the same lowered voice. Walk away.
It takes practice and it’s very hard to do at first, but it works. Just walk away, refusing to acknowledge banter, arguments, crying, yelling or any of that.
Don’t worry if they don’t sleep right away. Don’t worry if they don’t sleep at all the first night you try. Don’t worry if you go to bed and they still aren’t breathing those slow dreamy breaths. Give yourself a break. You deserve it. You can do anything, if you take care of you first.
Sony – thank you for offering such kind and loving support to Rhonda. I appreciate you.
Hi Rhonda – you might like the idea of the Warm Fuzzy Jar for encouraging cooperation at bedtime. Lots of my readers have found success with this: http://www.handsfreemama.com/…/29/how-to-fill-up-a-child/
Here is something I still use with my younger daughter age 8 at bedtime. I say, “At 7:45, I am going to begin reading stories. In the next 15 minutes you need to get on your pjs, brush teeth, and put your dirty clothes in the hamper. It is up to you how much of the story you hear. I will read from 7:45 til 8.” This really motivates her to get what she needs to get done so she can hear the story. It is important to stick to what you said. If you said “lights out at 8,” and she/he did not hear the story, that is the consequence. The next day remind her/him that she/he missed the story so she will need to do nightly duties more quickly tomorrow if she/he wants to hear it.
I will also ask my colleague, Sandy Blackard, to chime in. She always has highly beneficial suggestions for my readers.
Rachel,
That is the BEST thing I have heard all day! I get so frustrated at bed time too, and it’s because it’s full of rushing, lollygagging, and arguing as well. I go from being super-mom, to grumpy-mom during this time.
I LOVE reading to my kids (or my daughter reading to us), but usually have to skip it because we are running late. Time seems to fly by at that time of the day for some reason. I am going to start implementing your idea tonight!
YAY! I just love when we can share ideas that ease the daily struggle and bring a little more peace and connection into our lives. It feels so good to know we are not alone and that there is HOPE. Best wishes, Tracie!
The Hands Free Mama by Rachel, No Regrets Parenting by Dr Rotbart and Duct Tape parenting by Vicki Hoeffle have inspired my parenting journey. Don’t give up hope, creating new habits take time and creating a supportive family relationship takes hardwork but it is worth it!
Fabulous article to hear from you again 🙂 Your articles have become so much a part of my days and weeks that I was missing the insights and goings of you and family..Thanks RS. Namaste 🙂
Thank you, Patti. This means a great deal to me.
Oh how I have missed you Rachel! So happy to see your beautiful words in my newsfeed this morning even if they do make me teary 🙂 My boys are older now but for several years you have challenged me to look at things through different eyes….. through their eyes, less forgiving eyes, more loving eyes. Thank you SO much! much love.
I so appreciate that, Mel. I am thankful to share this journey with you.
thank you for the needed reminder
Wonderful! I have been feeling EXACTLY like that lately … I feel like an old lady and don’t even feel like my body wants to jump anymore … Always tired … I used to eb full of life three years ago. I’ll try and see things through new eyes – Beginner’s Eyes. I have a three year daughter who has so much enthusiasm and I don’t want my “lack of” take away from that. I’m losing her day naps and being having more coffee to cope with losing all that time in the day to quickly have a nap and get things done … I want to do my art which I hope will bring in money by the time she’s at school but I have lost every creative bone in my body unless it comes to doing art WITH my daughter … I’ll take a look at 21 Day challenge as well. Thagt might help. Thank you!!!
Welcome back!!! I was SO excited when I opened fb this morning and you were there!!! It has been a rough 21 days without you. I didn’t realize how much your daily inspiration encouraged and helped my little family. Thank you for so eloquently putting into words how I have felt dice my daughter was born 7 years ago. I just want to experience life as close as possible to the way she does. Because it is so obvious she is loving it when I tend to fall into the old and worn out all too often. We, too, have beautiful ducks adorning our home. They started two years ago and now thanks to you they will be wonderful reminder!!!
Thanks, Connie. It feels so good to be welcomed back so lovingly!
This really hits home – thank you! I think for me, part of my slump is the winter blues. But I don’t want to use that as an excuse. But I think you’re right that we can always practice looking at things with Beginners Eyes!
Rachel,
I am a Mother to a vibrant, spontaneous , life-loving nine year old daughter who seems very much like your Avery. Your article makes me cry because I too had lost the knowledge of how to be alive. My daughter knows how to live and love and she does it so effortlessly ! Because of your article and your precious Avery, I will follow the path and see through beginner’s eyes !!
I am so glad. I look forward to telling Avery how she inspired you. Thank you for letting us know.
Welcome back Rachel! It was not long before the 21 Day Challenge that I found you. I had been speaking with my mother and others about how I wanted to change the way I parented and go back to the roots of how I always imagined I would parent my children before the nature/nuture (although I love my parents dearly!) and daily stress of life started to consume me and my family. You put so many of the thoughts, and my previous parenting experience, all down in from of me in a way I could not have needed at any other moment. While I struggled through the 21 Day Challenge and I definitely faltered I keep my head up and focused on what I wanted. However as I got to see the spark in my children’s eyes and so much more happy laughter and lightening moods throughout our house it kept me forging ahead wanting the change to come as quickly as it could. Thank you for reminding us and inspiring us to chose love. I have found even in that regard it gives me the time I need to also start to see things with ‘Beginner’s Eyes’……..
Thank you so much for posting this morning. I love reading all of your posts! I was just praying this morning that there would be a tidbit on here from you ❤️ Thank you for being so real!
Thank you! That makes my day, Lisa!
Welcome back we missed you! As always thank you for words you never fail to touch my heart and remind me what is most important in this world.
Thank you for a completely different reason other than your inspiring words on parenthood – I worked for the American Heart Association years and years ago FOR years and years, and gave away HUNDREDS of those Schoolsite programs out that included Jump Rope for Heart programs. I’d seen kids and teachers and schoolsite volunteers get excited about contributing to the program and helping their own heart health, but this is the first time I’ve read about a PARENT getting excited, using the jump rope as a kick-start to doing some good things in HER life. You ROCK!
WOW! This is so wonderful, Hope! Thank you for taking the time to tell me. You have truly touched my heart!
Thank you so much Rachel. I was on a deadline to write a sermon for I Corinthians 13 and have been sick with the flu. I said to myself out loud this a.m., “I got nothin'”. But then I read your article, and with tears streaming down my face the whole sermon came to me in a flash. Just like Paul was telling the 1st century Christians in Corinth, without love, “I got nothin”. THANK YOU so much for your continued dedication to choosing love and sharing it with us. Roy
Oh my goodness, you have given me chills, Pastor Roy! Do you know where I get much of my inspiration? From sermons! My family and I have gone to many churches throughout our moves, but I never fail to get inspired by the pastor’s divinely delivered messages no matter what church we attend. It makes me feel so happy to know that you found inspiration for your sermon here! Oh how I wish I could attend your church and hear your words. Thank you for letting me know.
While taking the time to not clean up the kitchen or start dinner and instead to let my four year old paint our hands with water colors and then laugh like crazy……I thought of you this weekend and how from your blogs and encouragement I have learned to appreciate these moments and not get annoyed or miss the opportunity to truly enjoy the little moments in life and then I though wow she hasn’t blogged in a while….wonder where she has been……I am glad to hear that you found your ducks and that you are in a good place 🙂 Thanks for helping so many of us find our own ducks!
I am grateful to know this, Linds! Thank you for telling me!
Thank you for this post today. In the drudgery of day to day life and with the passing of years, it’s easy to forget the beauty in life. I was an irritable, cranky mom Saturday morning – chores, bills, practices. I just wanted to be left alone. Then we spent Saturday night camping with my boys under the Texas sky. The stars were wondrous, the night breeze cool. I laid in my sleeping bag, surrounded by warm, snuggly bodies – my darling husband, my two, sweet, joyous boys and my very smelly dog. It felt like heaven.
I can relate! Whenever I get outside, my entire perspective changes. Thank you for sharing your imperfectly perfect moment!
You must have been reading my mind this morning…this is exactly how I have been feeling for the last three months. My children are older (17 and 19) and they don’t find excitement in the little things like they did when they were younger. I have been in a slump and even stopped going to the gym. I’m positive that I’m not the only one that gets the winter blues but it is always nice to hear that I have company in trying to get excited about even the smallest things that used to bring joy and happiness. Thank you Rachel.
I love Avery’s enthusiasm. Seriously, it flies off the page and I found myself excited by her enthusiasm. It definitely is more typical for children to feel this way. However, you have some good ideas on how to get that excited for us adults. It feels good to enthusiastic.
“Follow my path.”… “Something told me those were words to remember.”
Yes, oh my goodness YES.
Oh, my stars, how much I love this. It’s so fitting because I’ve been thinking that I need to follow my son’s lead more often and actually just loosen up and let myself be a kid again. Thank you thank you so much!
Thank you Rachel, these notes from you life keep influencing mine just when I need them!
Thank you for this post! We homeschool our six children and I sometimes have to remind myself to be excited about what they find interesting, but when I pause and let their excitement wash over me, the topic is always more interesting, even if it is “just” a place for us to connect. It reminds me of the quote about listening to the small things our children want to tell us so that they will confide the big things later. Thanks for the reminder. I love your blog!
So enjoyed your new posting. Brought a lot of joy to this cold day. Children have a way of openins our eyes to the smallest things that can bring happiness to all. I worked in the office at a school(456) for many years in Mandeville, La. I so miss my job and my kiddos. These past few days, my 82 year old Mom has been in the hospital six hours away from me. This crazy weather has not allowed me to be with her and daddy. She is home now and I am making my way there tomorrow. I wonder if she would like a ” spa treatment”. I will definitely let her read your blog. Thanks again for bringing a smile to my face…
Rachel – I wish I would have seen your 21 day challenge; but it seems I was living it without knowing about the challenge. A friend of mine turned me on to your blog about a year and a half ago.
Ever since, I find myself looking to you for inspiration. Although I have never been married and have no children of my own – I still gain so much from your perspective.
To be kinder to myself. Not be so caught up in what other people think about me – but be more caught up in doing what I know is living a life of love.
The post that spoke to me the most was #onlylovetoday . If there is a way I could order bracelets with those words (and wear with my work uniform) I would have ordered them already.
Naming things we love about others and ourselves; allowing ourselves to have the excitement of a child is how I attempt to live each day.
You are absolutely a blessing and I can’t wait to meet you in person!!
Always,
Robin
aka “The Sky Angel”
Thank you, Robin! What a beautiful, heartfelt message! I assume you have seen the Only Love Today bracelets, but just in case you haven’t, they are here: http://shop.handsfreemama.com (leather and non-leather options)
I am thankful to walk alongside you on this journey!
On new years day my husband and I were rearranging bedrooms making more space for our children and I stumbled across a picture of us on our first wedding anniversary. I looked SO happy. I looked at that picture and couldn’t remember the last time I smiled like that. I asked my husband and he couldn’t remember either. Since then I’ve been asking the same questions. Where has my hope gone? Where has my joy gone? I sat back later that week and thought about the last nine years of marriage. We’ve been through a lot in that time. On top of the marriage issues we’ve faced, my husband lost his job and couldn’t find work for 2 years. We moved several times. My best friends 5 year old son died. I had three kids and a miscarriage in less than 3 years. I realized all these things have led me to just survive. To just make it through a day. Looking at that picture that day made me want more than just survival. I wanted to feel hope and joy again. My youngest is going to be 4 next month. I’ve decided to go back to school in the fall. It’s a scary decision. But when I made it I had a glimmer of hope like I hadn’t felt in a long time. So thank you for your post today. It’s a confirmation for me that I’m moving in the right direction. And thank you for the encouragement to keep trying new things and to be open to new possibilities. Even typing that makes a smile come to my face. I’m excited for this year and what it had in store. And I haven’t felt that way for a long time!! It’s a good feeling.
This is very powerful, Val. I feel inspired just by reading it. Thank you so much for standing into the light of realness with me and saying, “Me too.” It feels comforting when we know we are not alone in our struggles. I wish you all the best as you return to school … and return to living joyfully again. Love, Rachel
Just want to say ‘you are amazing’. All the way from Australia. x
Look at the comments on this page Rachel ~ you make SUCH a difference in so many lives. We need your words more often! We need your wisdom……your “down to earth” thoughts and the way to stay on the path that has been placed before us! I’m so glad you came into my life, gym, computer, and heart!
Thank you for the inspiration, Nancy! You made this all possible! You are a blessing in so many ways.
My 5 yo daughter (kindergarten) came home saying that for a “five dollar ‘dalmatian’ she could get a duck. At her school, the kinders don’t do the full fundraiser. She wears her duck proudly!!
That is the cutest! Thank you for sharing. Love it!
Hi Rachel ~ thank you for this… you truly have a way with words and expressing what so many of us are feeling/experiencing. You’re a breath of real, fresh, re-invigorating air! 🙂
I am going to try to see you in Carmel on 3/14!! I’d love to have the chance to meet you in person!
Hi Ansley, I appreciate your loving feedback about my writing. That is just pure fuel to my writer’s heart! And YAY that I get to meet you when I speak in Carmel on March 14! I look forward to it!
Although Valentines Day is past, and your 21 day challenge was gone before, I thought I would share..
My sister is going through a tough divorce, so with Valentines Day right around the corner, I thought this would maybe throw her over the edge. I asked her if she and her 3 grandchildren would like to come and have a slumber party with me and my 3 granchildren on Feb. 14.. I sent Valentine invitations to her grandchildren so house and arranged for my grandchildren to come.. This on the other side of the coin, gave her son and my son’s an opportunity to have dates with their spouses, with us having a grand time with our grandchildren, while taking her mind off her divorce. I decorated my house with streamers I had made out of hearts, bows on pedestals, needless to say it was surely a house of love.. During our party we made paper crowns, decorated hearts, made robes out of material, for the prince’s and princess’s, ate heart shaped pizzas with red drinks. Everyone had a wonderful happy time with no thought or mention of her divorce. I, myself benefited as well, my Valentine understood why I was doing this and I had an extended Valentine date myself!
Thank you for your inspirational articles, I enjoy reading them and have forwarded them to my children so they can also read them..
This is so beautiful and uplifting it brings tears to my eyes. This is indeed the meaning of love. I am so grateful for your heart, Joni. Thank you for sharing and inspiring us all.
What a wonderful sister you are to do that … What a wonderful idea! It’s the kind of thing my sister would do for me. It’s the small things in this world that matter, that’s for sure. Very inspiring and I’m so glad I read it Joni.
The Choose love challenge was a great reminder to keep my mouth shut for 30 seconds instead of yelling or complaining at my kids. It helped me stay more present and fueled my desire to look at the positive and have an attitude of gratitude. Super excited to get your blog post. Your writing inspires me to revel in the small beauty of life, like things that are heart shaped (rocks, splattered water and old gum are just a few examples) and the way my kids play and to notice their sweet freckles and to enjoy them each day. Missed you and send you love from Colorado!
What a wonderful post. Your timing is perfect. I sit here 4 mos pregnant with my 2nd and although I’m very excited about an adventure with 2, I feel the monotony of day to day same thing with life. I just said out loud the other day when I was watching a child become very excited about something small “I wish there were something that made me excited like that” I think it may be a bit of winter wanderlust. I need to see a new place and explore something foreign. Anyway, thank you for the post. It’s really great when I know I’m not the only one feeling this way. The comments reaffirm that as well.
I had read your post yesterday and it made me laugh last night! Picked up daughter from daycare, on to dance class, then to a few stores and run some errands, next thing I know it is half past 7 pm and we have not even made it home. So I pulled up to her favorite fast food place so the kid could eat it on our half hour drive home and have something in her little belly before bed and avoid a super late bedtime! I did not tell her we were going to stop. As we pulled in to the drive up she squealed with delight! I thought to myself… I wish I could get excited like that about surprises!
This is just brilliant…
“As a child, nearly everything is a new path. Children feel excitement about every opportunity, every trail, and every experience because they see it through Beginner’s Eyes.
But as an adult, it becomes more difficult to encounter anything novel or unfamiliar. Daily redundancy and expected outcomes bring a lifelessness that can feel all-consuming and hopeless.
But just because you are an adult does not mean you must live a life void of excitement, passion, and joy. Just because you are no longer a beginner does not mean you can’t have Beginner’s Eyes like a child. You can. Simply go off the beaten path.”
It’s time for me to do that with my delightful daughter and recapture the joys of life!
YAY! Thank you for pinpointing the words that spoke to you. That is like a hug to my writer’s heart! Please let me know how your adventures go. It sounds like you will be in very capable (and joyful) hands!
Wow. I love your posts. I do the ugly cry every single time. 🙁
Dear Rachel,
I wanted to share a simple, yet powerful moment during my 21 day I Choose Love Challenge. The week leading up to your post, my youngest son (who is four) was constantly waking up during the night and appearing at my bedside. After a few sleepless nights, I began becoming impatient and was frustrated with the minimal sleep I was getting. The day after your post, he appeared again at my bed….but this night was different. Exhausted as I was, I chose love. Hand in hand, we tip toed back downstairs, and I lay in his bed combing my hands through his hair in silence. In this moment, I realized that he needed ME. He wanted his mom, to comfort and be there with him. I fell asleep in his bed that night filled with love, and woke up the next morning with his little arms wrapped around me. No amount of sleep was worth that moment. I Chose Love, and it repaid me ten fold.
I will forever be grateful for you; Rachel and your inspiring words. Take Care,
Shannon
This is so beautiful and so touching, Shannon. I am so grateful to read these words and experience this powerful moment through you. Thank you for walking beside me on this journey and encouraging me this way to keep sharing my heart.
Ooooohhhh … That’s soooooo sweet Shannon. It made tears well in me. Me on the other hand DIDN’T read this article until after the fact and I had the same dealings but wasn’t so “nice” and realised a couple of days later that she DID need me as I don’t think she was well – had the snuffles. It didn’t help that my partner came in and got cross with her because HE was woken. Normally he sleeps through it all. Admittedly, he did go away for a while and came back with a calm in his walk and his voice (after I said that it was unnecessary to be getting so angry) and actually took over from a cross Mummy due to what had happened. I have been a lot more filled with love since reading this article and it has certainly made a difference. I’m just now dealing with all the “leftovers” of not “showing the love”. I’ve had to go and repair a VERY sore shoulder yesterday and the energy that I have since doing so is amazing! I haven’t felt this good in a VERY long time. I am really going to start being a bit kinder to the ones around me AND myself from now on. It makes such a difference – I know for sure that the sore shoulder is partly to do with stress and anger build up which could be dealt with a lot differently. You helped me see that I walked through the wrong sliding door that day/night 9it was a tough week with my little one) but you walked through the right one and YOU made a HUGE difference!! Well done.
“Compassion for others begins with kindness to ourselves” Pema Chodron
Brigitte, Thank-you for your kind words. It is uplifting to know we are not alone in our struggles. During my journey with “Hands Free Mama” I have learned that being kinder to myself has allowed love to flow more freely to those around me…this is my hope for you as well. Take care of yourself, Shannon
“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love & affection” Buddha
Thank you Shannon. Your words are so very true and every day I remind myself of this through reading words like Rachel’s and yours. I notice a HUGE difference when I stop and think before I act out towards not only towards others but towards myself. It’s definitely working for the best! :0)
Years ago I went with my 3rd grade son on a field trip and rode on the school bus. I was struck by how happy, vibrant, curious (and loud) these kids were. They were so busy, so engaged, so alive. Contrast that to the morning commuter train when you can hear a pin drop. What happens to us as we age? Where does all that joy for living go?
Rachel,
My son is a soph in college 200 miles away from where we live. I read your wonderful post then immediately walked upstairs to his room to look at his little ducks from many years ago, still hanging from a lanyard on the back of his desk chair. Thank you for bringing back such a sweet memory and putting a big smile on my face this freezing winter afternoon!
Awww … this brings happy tears to my eyes! I love that he still had the ducks and they brought you a smile and a fond memory! Thank you for sharing!
Thank you,
My mom died in January she was the excitement builder in the family. At 85 she loved life. Her memory is alive and I need to not let sad take too much joy away.
Thank you,
susan
I saved this post to make sure I read it later because the title resonated so much with my life. Thanks for sharing this, Rachel! I’m open to feel excited about the small and forgotten things in adult life 🙂
Thank you for this post. Yes, beginner’s eyes and mind- such a beautiful and liberating place to be! The world feels refreshing… inviting… a big, magical playground.
Also wanted to share a funny thought popped into my head as I was reading this. I was remembering back to this scene from the movie Knocked Up and this line in particular: “I wish I liked anything as much as my kids like bubbles”. Wow. That simple line really stuck with me. It’s so true! My kids teach me all the time how to just be in the moment and enjoy the simple things. It’s inspiring watching how free, uninhibited and engaged they are in their play. And, yes, in the moments I allow myself to join them in their play and exploration, I feel some of that joy bubbling up, too.
So awesome, Rachel. Thank you igniting lots of sparks! Just came across your writing this evening and have been indulging and savouring through your posts! I am so blessed to have an amazing little family- you have just amplified my joy and wonder at it all!
I read this post last year and the words “accept a challenge” were still ringing in my ears when my husband told me about a basic motorcycle riders course and asked me if I wanted to take it. I decided that was a challenge I would accept and to my surprise I love riding motorcycles! I never would have guessed it. I keep coming back to this post to remind me so that I don’t miss out on other experiences I might love but would miss out on without that extra little push. Thank you!