*name & story have been used with permission
A little over four years ago I started my Hands Free journey to let go of distraction and grasp the moments that mattered. It became my daily practice to write down the little moments of meaningful connection that I would’ve missed had I remained tethered to my devices, pressures, and regrets. What I experienced during my designated Hands Free pockets of time was so powerful I knew it was meant to be shared. I started publishing my daily Hands Free successes and failures on a blog. This helped me stay accountable to my goal—to live more and love more in the precious time that I’d been given. But there was more. My willingness to share my story was unexpectedly reciprocated. Each day for the past four years, I’ve heard from people I do not know. But they tell me their stories and inspire me in ways I could not be inspired alone.
Recently I opened my inbox to this:
“I have you to thank for the light bulb that lit up inside of me that turned into a flaming inferno of wanting to connect with my children. I have you to thank for the belly laugh (the best laugh that I have had with my oldest in years) that I would have missed had I not been in a ‘Hands Free Zone’ that I’ve designated and stuck to. I have you to thank for the wall in my kitchen (which is against my obsessive compulsive nature) that I have posted blog entries and favorite quotes from your book. This wall is what I look at when my baby is crying so loudly that I want to rip my hair out—your words are the caution cones that tell me to slow down and embrace my screaming baby and laugh. I have you to thank for my life, my children's lives, and the amazing mom that I never knew I could become to them. I have you to thank for raising me from the dead; for that I will be eternally grateful. Thank you for saving me.”
This message was written by a single, full-time working student/mother. I could see her in her kitchen. Her eyes weary from lack of sleep … baby food stains on the front of her shirt … her older child’s homework splayed across the counter along with bills and school reminder notes. I could see her trying … trying … trying. I did not know this woman, but I adored her.
Attached to the e-mail message was Fallon’s completed assignment for her psychology class. It was a short description of her fall semester goal: Keep Things Simple. To her this meant trying to avoid “overwhelm” which she knew had a negative impact on her mood, her progress, her sleep and of course, her children. “Keep Things Simple means not sweating the small stuff, getting tasks completed in a timely manner, not over exaggerating, and eliminating unnecessary stress to enjoy my life to the fullest,” she wrote.
Fallon listed several strategies that would help her reach her goal. First, her Inspiration Wall filled with meaningful quotes and artwork by her children would act as a visual reminder to “slow down and not miss life.” Second, a daily planner neatly organized and color coded would enable her to keep track of appointments, assignments, financial responsibilities, and family needs. Third, she designated “Hands Free Zones” around the house and during certain times of day that would be device free. Lastly, she placed two open books on her kitchen table with pens and highlighters. “The Bible and a book that my older son bought me for my birthday this year, Hands Free Mama. These two books are food to my soul, reminding me to slow down and not miss my life,” she’d written to her psychology professor.
I did not know this woman, but yet I felt as if I did. Fallon's steps toward a more present, gratitude-filled, and simpler way of life sounded an awful like my own when I started my journey. I wanted more than anything to see this brave, loving, and hard-working mother succeed. And because one of my purposes in life is to encourage others, I wrote her back with words of affirmation and support. I also sent her a few more signs for her Inspiration Wall and a bracelet because hers had faded from constant wear and bath time submersion.
Over a span of several weeks, Fallon and I corresponded. We both felt we were connected for a reason. During the day, I often found myself wondering how she was doing. I most wondered if she was receiving any signs of confirmation – signs that she was on the right track – like loving smiles, unexpected tender words, “Sunset Moments” that had been vital to fueling me forward on my own journey.
The other day I reached out to check on her. Much to my delight she said her older child was sharing more information with her than he used to be too shy to bring up. Instead of “I don't know” she was being provided with voluntary information about friends, teachers, and what interested him at the moment. Fallon also noticed he was asking her to engage in activities with him that required time and presence. They’d recently set out twenty plastic cups, filled them with water, and marked them with a point value. The two of them laughed and bonded while tossing a badminton piece into the cups over and over. Due to her newfound availability, this boy (who used to race off to the television) was now inviting her to join in activities with him.
The results of Fallon's intentional presence were not as obvious with the ten-month old baby, but there was definitely a notable difference. “I am slowing down to show him flowers and plants and watching his face as he discovers new things. He will look at me and talk in baby language with his eyebrows raised, and I can tell he is really telling me something serious. More than anything though, I am remembering the time I am present with him—like when I stopped in the middle of cleaning the kitchen to dance and sing, his little face happy and mesmerized by this little moment with his mama. Being able to remember these moments is my greatest gift,” Fallon said.
I could relate. I could remember. One of the most reinforcing results of giving my undivided attention to my loved ones was the peace that settled over my frantic mind and productivity-driven soul. Never in my life had I ever felt like I was right where I was supposed to be until I gave myself permission to Be Where You Are.
I vividly remember one particular evening in the beginning stages of my journey when I gave myself permission to stop thinking and stop moving—to be fully available to take that moment in.
Let’s just be here. I thought to myself that night as I tucked my older daughter Natalie into bed. I’d been reading bedtime stories to her for many years, but my mind was always somewhere else. I was always eager to close her bedroom door. But my newfound awareness on my Hands Free journey motivated me to want to Be All There.
“There’s no way you can do it,” my inner critic scoffed at such a lofty goal. “You’re Queen Multi-Tasker. You are a hurrier, a checker off-er, a ‘why do it later when you can do it now’ person through and through. You are a moving target—even illness cannot stop you!”
But love could. Love could stop me.
I knew I was not a patient, Take Your Time Person. I was always thinking ahead and experienced guilt when I felt like I was being “unproductive.” But all hope was not lost. I could fake it. I could act like a Take Your Time Person. I could do it for my child.
I searched my memory bank for a person who made me feel like I was the only person who mattered when I was in her company. Instantly I thought of my second grade teacher who would allow me to read my multi-page stories to her. Ms. Paluska would tuck her hand beneath her chin like she actually enjoyed this time with me. She would nod enthusiastically. She would smile as she listened. There could have been a classroom of twenty-five second graders going nuts behind her but you would’ve never known. I was the only one in her world during those moments.
And now there I was, laying next to my child, wanting so badly to give her my full presence. I was not a patient person, but I would act one. I could act like Ms. Paluska.
For the first time in a very long time, I did not think about the dishes in the sink … or the messages in the inbox … or the trash needing to go curbside … or the ache in my hip in need of an ice pack. “Let’s just think about the little girl in need of a little time with her mom,” I said to myself.
I focused on Natalie’s sun-kissed hair falling across her cheek, the way her pillow smelled like Suave shampoo, and the way my breath steadied in time with hers.
And when she noticed I wasn’t in a hurry to leave, she talked. And I talked. And then ten minutes or twelve minutes, it didn’t really matter. I stopped watching the clock. I shut her door feeling calm, content, and connected to my child and my own heart. I vowed to do it again the next night. For a handful of minutes each night, I could Be All There.
It wasn’t always easy. Sometimes Natalie would say “stay” and it took every ounce of strength in my body to oblige. That is when I would count. I would count to 50 or 100 in my head. And every time I mustered up that little extra time, Natalie would say something important, funny, or simply whisper, “I love you.” I would be thankful I stayed. I would be thankful I did not miss it.
Just the other night, out of the blue, Natalie said, “I like the way you take your time putting me to bed.”
I actually looked over my shoulder. She couldn’t be talking to me, I thought. “Take your time” were words that had nothing to do with me.
Well … they didn’t used to.
But I guess they do now.
I had to fake being a Take Your Time Person, but eventually that is who I’ve become, at least to this little girl at tuck-in time. And does it really matter how I got to this place? Does it really matter how you or I get to the place we want to be? Whether it’s signs plastered on your walls, books opened on the bedside table, strings tied around your pinkie, promises written in ballpoint pen, or the best acting you’ve ever done in your life, these are all ways of getting where you want to go and becoming who you want to be.
Because in the end, those on the other side of your undivided presence feel what you want them to feel. Important. Loved. Heard. Those on the receiving end of your loving presence are left better than they were before. And isn’t that the ultimate goal? I think so.
The Presence Pledge*
I hope after spending an hour … a day … a lifetime in my presence,
I leave your heart fuller,
your smile wider,
your spirit stronger
your future brighter
than you could have ever imagined by yourself.
© Rachel Macy Stafford 2014
*The Presence Pledge is now available in two styles
Like Fallon, posting signs around my house to slow down for love and silence my inner bully were vital to my Hands Free transformation. Sayings like, “XO Before You Go” and “Only Love Today” that I once wrote in black Sharpie are now available as beautiful prints. The Presence Pledge was recently created in gold foil and sea foam green due to your many heartfelt requests. I extend a huge thank you to my sister-in-law, Stacie, for being the amazing force behind the Hands Free Shop. I write the words and she brings these tangible reminders to life and to the homes of readers all over the world. The Hands Free vintage tee’s are on sale for $12. When I throw on that t-shirt it puts me in a frame of mind to really let go & live.
Here is a life-changing opportunity that can bring you closer to your goal of a more meaningfully connected, simpler, gratitude-filled life:
A Simple Year: 12 Months of Guided Simplicity – I am so honored to be one of twelve simplicity authors who will be sharing wisdom designed to help you simplify your life. Check out the twelve topics for the course here. Along with inspiring and informative articles that will come right to your inbox, there will also be a live webinar each month where you can connect with the authors, ask questions and meet other people on a similar path. The live webinar will be recorded and provided so you can view anytime. All the information you need to know about the course and early-bird sign up is here.
Friends of The Hands Free Revolution, please share your current goal for living better & loving more. What’s working? What’s not? We can learn so much from each other. I am grateful to walk beside you on this journey. Your messages fuel me.
P.S. Don't forget I will be sharing strategies to let go of distraction & perfection with Experience Life magazine in “A Healthy Revolution: The Virtual Conference.” This is a FREE online event where you can hear from today's most progressive experts about how to live happier & healthier even in the face of real challenges. In my interview (airing 8pm CST 10/20/14), I will be describing my first steps to a less distracted, more meaningfully connected life & what I do when I find myself slipping back into old ways. I will also discuss how living Hands Free has changed how I relate to my spouse, my parents, close friends, & complete strangers. I hope you will join me!
I am a better mom because of the wisdom you share. Thank you for the gentle reminders of what is really important.
Rachel Macy Stafford says
Thank you, Debbie. It is so comforting to know you are here reading and walking beside me on this journey. Thank you for taking the time to comment.
New habits are formed by repeating actions. Those habits form who we are. Sometimes we slip, but we know full well when it is about to happen. This weekend I was reminded that I need to take time to see that my children only wanted to help me, not slow me down. I have my husband to thank for that but I also realized that I often focus solely on my children and not so much on my spouse. I really need to take my time with him, too. I don’t want to miss out on anything he has to say to me because he is important too. Your words will definitely shape the new habit I want to begin forming this week, which will make my week turn out for the better. Thank you.
It seems living better and loving more collided this summer. I said goodbye to the teaching profession to focus on homeschooling my youngest and teaching a writing course for a handful of kids…living better: walking on faith that when doing something I loved again, the joy would follow. We also unexpectedly took guardianship of a 13 year old. ..loving more. It’s all a blend of living and loving, finding the best version of myself to be daily. Intentional living and living all rolled into one.
Clare Hollingsworth says
I can only begin to imagine the beneficial nurture that is being done across the globe in families, freeing them to be loved and loving, due to this website. What a wonderful positive force for good you are in the world! 🙂
Thank you, Rachel for sharing this friend’s story as well as your own.
Here is a post of another woman’s intentional time with her child who is now grown. I think it will warm your heart.
Rachel Macy Stafford says
This is absolutely beautiful! Thank you for sharing this. I feel blessed just by reading it. I will not forget the wisdom and encouragement in that message.
kristin Teed says
This morning as I served breakfast to my 5 year old he said, “Why don’t you ever sit down and eat breakfast with me?” Yikes. “I’m busy making lunches and cleaning up the breakfast dishes” I said. To which he said, “But Mama, you have to eat too”. I realized that just being in the same room with him and chatting with him while HE ate and I busied myself with kitchen chores wasn’t enough. He noticed I wasn’t taking the time to eat myself, and most importantly, sit and enjoy the meal with him. A good reality check and goes to show these little people DO NOTICE. The TV was off, the phones or computers weren’t being used, we were actively talking with each other, yet he knew I wasn’t giving him my full attention. Kids know multi-tasking when they see it! I sat down with coffee cup in hand and gave him several minutes of my undivided attention (as he ever so sloowwwly nibbled his way through his breakfast). I fought off my inner bully, inner critic, inner urges, inner everything. He just glowed. Proving, once again, this journey you are leading us all on is SO WORTH IT! Love today’s post, giving us permission to “fake it” if we need to. That is kinda what I did at the breakfast table, and it worked! Was feeling guilty about ‘faking it’ at times, but after reading today’s blog, I understand it’s okay. Thank you Rachel!
I am more honored than I could ever express through my tear filled eyes… I would be lost without you, and so would my boys… thank you… thank you… thank you…
One of her comments “echoes” of what I read years ago & still am challenged by, Were I called upon to offer a formula for ‘the perfect moment,’ I might advise to just be where you are’ – one of the hardest places to arrive at in the here-there-everywhere-at-the-same-time world we’ve created.” RODICA WOODBURY, Associate editor, Out West newsletter,page 223,
A Woman’s Guide to a Simpler Life, Andrea Van Steenhouse, Ph.D. with Doris A. Fuller
Oh this hit home, as all of your posts do. My 11 yr old son chooses bed time, usually later than it’s supposed to be, to talk about everything on his mind. I just want to get in my 30 minutes of “me time” so I’m impatient and rush him. I need to start staying and listening. It will no doubt have positive consequences down the road. I’m also super impatient with him every AM. He has ADHD and the morning hours are especially challenging. I feel so guilty every day on my way to work that I’ve blown up, been impatient, yelled (I’m a great yeller) and then I tell myself that I’m not perfect and I can try to be better the next day. I’m failing at that but will keep trying. Thank you for your words and for a place where we can come to know we’re not alone in our experiences!
I love your blog, even though I don’t have kids. 🙂 Today’s blog in particular made think of my 80 something parents, who really only need and want a bit of my time and my undivided attention.
Thanks for writing!
Stephanie that is so true! My parents are a similar age and my visits are usually a whirlwind affair squeezed in between visiting other people and shopping when I go to town. My mother is always offering to have us stay overnight and I always refuse thinking it creates more work for her. But it may actually be a request to slow down and be present. I learned my multi-tasking, whirlwind ways at her knee and maybe she doesn’t have the words to articulate what she really wants. Thanks you for this perspective.
Vanessa Rosage says
I am so excited you made the Presence Pledge into a print. When I had my second baby, my daughter, we gave her a blessing and as my pledge to my little girl I read this pledge word for word. I couldn’t make it through without tearing up. It was exactly what I wanted to promise her for the rest of our relationship. Thank you for creating and sharing this. I cannot wait to get one and hang it in our home.
Lindsey Bell says
Thank you, Rachel. Thank you for giving me permission to pretend when I don’t really “feel like giving my full attention.” I needed someone to tell me it was okay if I didn’t feel it at first. The feelings will come if I choose to be there. Thank you.
Katy Bell Hamnes says
Crazy bout this post! Thank you. It resonates so much closer to home that I’d ever care to admit. Thank you.
I just purchased one of the prints. Can not wait to hang it as a reminder! I didn’t see the “gray background” print with gold foil – as in one of the pictures – as an option in the checkout. Is that available? Or just the white with gold foil?
Thank you again!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!! I don’t even remember how I came across this blog but it’s come at the most important time in my life … A friend passed away a few weeks back and it’s been a HUGE reminder to slow down a little and focus on the important things … I’ve just been away from my little one to attend her funeral and made a pact with myself, only to return and be totally swamped by everything. I can see it’s not going to be easy but you are a great reminder to smile when there’s tantrums and laugh when I would normally get angry. Thank you!! OOOOPS … I’ve got a tantrum ready to start. I best attend to that … with a smile! :0)
Jan Beswick says
Hi Rachel, would you consider giving me permission to sew. Your pledge for my own benefit, as a gift to my grandaughters. It would be a stitchery with yourself acknowledged as author. Thank you from “down under”.
Sandy Cooper says
I am in the busiest season of my life right now. Renovating our current home to sell. Building a new home and EVERYTHING that goes with that. Husband in a very busy professional position–and he’s also a triathlete in training for a big event. And raising 3 beautiful kids.
Disclosure: Sometimes I can’t even read your blog because I want so badly to slow down, but I don’t know where to cut. It just frustrates me more that I desire to BE THERE, but I can’t. So I get kinda mad at you.
I’m not tethered to my phone. I’ve already broken my addiction to social media. I don’t watch television. It’s just life. It’s everything. I always have the sense of “urgent” in my stomach, because if I fall even one day behind…it just piles up.
So, this post came at a good time. I have been praying for God to help me love my family well in the midst of all this chaos. I realize it’s only a season. In a few months, our house will be built and we will be all moved in and things will get back to normal. But I don’t want to miss an entire year of our lives because I was too rushed to enjoy it.
It’s been months since I sat, unhurried, with a kid. It’s been months since I did something purposely recreational with one of them, that didn’t double as an errand. I can’t remember a time I didn’t say, “Hurry up” at least 10 times before school.
I have a sick child home today, and I can think about is how I have to clean up from all the renovations before the weekend babysitter comes (I am taking an anniversary weekend away with my husband…so that’s something!)
I’m going to seek God on this. Truly. Today. I believe this blog was exactly what God wanted me to see today.
Thank you. I’m not mad at you any more. 🙂
Ooooh, I could so relate to your post Sandy except without the reno’s and kids … I only have one child – 3 – I soooo feel that I can’t get on top of things. I’ve made goals to get certain things done by Christmas, like making a photo album of the first 3 years of my little girls life so that she can look at it later on in life … Get my house sorted so I CAN actually do the crafty things I want to with her that I can’t seem to get my hands on at the moment because things are in such chaos (since her birth). Not to mention that I have this awesome studio to set up so I can do the (crafty) things I love to do with her (and for myself as I’m an artist) which I need to get into and figure out a way of making work (to earn myself some money) without buying shelving (so kind of renovations) … So I feel VERY overwhelmed by it all and sometimes I actually feel guilty about spending time reading blogs like this when I should be spending time sorting other stuff … But we need time out right? This is my time out … But is it? Could I be utilising my time better? I know the things I need to do and should I need to be reminded by someone, or should I just be getting on with it? Aaaaah (sigh) … Let alone the fact that I spend all day with her because I don’t want to put her into day care for someone else to experience all the new things she does. I want to experience that. So I can make things better quality when I am with her, I actually do clean things up while she’s having breakfast otherwise things pile up. When I’ve done all my cleaning up, THEN I focus on my little girl and am fully present. AND, I never thought I’d be this person, but I let her watch a little bit of a DVD so I can sit down and have my breakfast (in peace) once I’ve cleaned up before we head out and spend quality time together doing this, that or the other. These little bits of “time out” for me make me a MUCH better person when I actually do spend time with her. I feel satisfied because I’ve sorted things and stayed on top of things. I think it’s really important to not live in chaos so the main part of the house remains in some semblance of order and the studio remains in chaos. I think it’s also good for them to learn that things need to be done. We need a bit of discipline in our lives so when we do sit back and share family time together, we REALLY spend family time together. I guess that’s what I’ve learned from this and posting this to you. Quality time can be made but a home that can be more easily be lived in if it’s not in chaos. They do say that our lives are based on a reflection of our surroundings. If our surroundings are in chaos, our stress levels are usually soaring as well. Yes, we still need to stop and smell the roses in between dealing with the chaos.
I’m so glad I’m not the only one who counts! I started this practice with my husband who processes things internally so we could have actual conversations without me rushing him or bowling him over with my own thoughts. It works wonders when I’m feeling rushed with the kiddos too!
Thank you for helping me: I took a 7 week hiatus from Facebook and now find I have more time for my family and things I needed to do to get done. I didn’t think I was addicted to Facebook, but I found out I was; I was spending more time on it than I realized.
Thank you for this reminder. I am exactly as you were-the over-thinker, over-doer, over-planner and bedtime is the most rushed part of my day. I am spent by that time, and I wish I could snap my fingers and my kids magically be in bed by themselves. There is coffee to get ready for the morning, dishes to finish washing, kids’ lunches to make, and finally, an hour to spend with my husband before I fall asleep on the couch from exhaustion.
I bought your book, got through a few chapters, but honestly I had to stop reading it. It hurt too much. I was in tears every night. I had been so looking forward to it downloading to my Kindle since I love to read, but I couldn’t bear looking in the mirror. I want to change…. I want to find this lifestyle you speak of, so badly. But it seems it’s just never a “good ” time. With one child in first grade/ 2 days a week of homeschooling her, a job, a husband, a 4 year old, a house to take care of. How can I find the ability to let go? I know it can be done, but my type-A personality can’t seem to relinquish the inner-drill sergeant/yeller. There is comfort in that. Comfort in knowing that everything will get done by the time it needs to be done. I know my children suffer from this. My youngest the other day told me that she likes it when I smile and laugh, and not when I yell at her. 🙁
I am going to start the book over tonight. I am currently in-between books and can’t seem to figure out what to read next. Maybe this is why. Maybe it’s finally time for me to open up your book and accept that change is a GOOD thing.
God bless you for sharing your life and helping so many!
I know exactly where you are coming from when it comes to reading Rachel’s book and it being too painful to endure thinking of all the things we have done or not done or missed, and I promise you that I still feel pain when I come to a new part of the book, but it is something that you have to say to yourself, “THIS PAIN, THIS GUILT is what fuels me to take away the pain that my children will have when they are grown if I am NOT present in their lives.” I have to tell myself that, to bear the burden of my pain and guilt so that my boys will not have pain caused by me not being present. PLEASE find the courage to read her book, and just remember; if everything were easy in life then everyone would be perfect… and NONE of us are. You can do it!
Rachel Macy Stafford says
Thank you, Fallon! You said it better than I ever could. So grateful for your encouragement to Tracie and to all who read your powerful words. For me, those painful looks inward are my turning points. Each time I do that, I am motivated to take steps to change.
Thank you ladies. You are both SO right.
Fallon, thank you for allowing Rachel to share your story. It REALLY hit home with me. When you said she “raised you from the dead”, I know exactly what you mean. I feel like I am alive, but not really “living” my life. I need to make the changes to allow me to savor every moment with my children while I can. Easier said than done, am I right? 🙂
Rachel, your stories have touched my heart and soul. Thank you so much for having the courage to share them. You have changed so many lives; now it’s time for me to allow you to change mine. I promise I will start reading your book again, even if it’s through tears every time. I know that in order to heal, I have to endure the pain.
Thank you again!
Yes, and yes. This was my most difficult week yet of the school year and it was because I was sick last week and felt the need to “catch up”. Sigh. So tomorrow I will kiss and cuddle more. At least I kissed them all tonight before bed. Hate when my desire to “do things” overpowers my need to “love people”.
Hi Rachel, I have now even become a preacher of your blog. I find myself encouraging others and telling them of how your blogs have been of great help to me. I just talked to my sister about handsfreemama and she was like, Please give me the website coz I feel I really need it right now.” On Tuesday, my daughter was dropped from school very late. We got home only to find that her dad hadn’t arrived. I looked at all the chores awaiting my action and I could feel myself start to get agitated. Thank you for your previous post: “which way to a peaceful response”, these days I find myself asking the same question. I am able to halt and calm myself before my feelings get out of hand. You have taught me how to stop being a perfectionist and how to discard the to-do-list. I just decided to do what was very necessary and surprisingly by the time my husband was watching the 9PM news, I had finished all the chores plus an extra one. And what was more to that is that I was so peaceful and relaxed I had to tell him what I have discovered. My life has changed. I am happier and even when I look in the mirror I am able to see beauty that I wasn’t seeing. I am no longer stressed and sulking and hating everyone including myself. My days are better and happier now. I have set a goal to be a better mom, a better wife and a better person in the community. One day at a time until I get there, and even when I slip, I will not give up. I had been searching and had read many articles on parenting but none ever had any impact on me. Because you open up and share your struggles and successes we are able to relate. You make us feel human and realise that we are not the only imperfect ones. Reading of your success gives me hope that I will make it. Rachel, you have a gift and thank you for sharing it with us. You are changing lives and whole households. May God continue increasing you!
Rachel Macy Stafford says
Wow. I am completely blown away and my heart is just so happy when I read about the changes occurring in your life! This is the kind of encouragement that fuels me to keep sharing the good & the bad. I feel so blessed to know all these lovely details about the changes you have made and the impact those changes are having on you! You have inspired me and I am sure there are many others too. I am grateful you took the time to let us all know. With love, Rachel
Winnie, you said that so well and I couldn’t agree more! We are blessed to have found this Blog! Thank you Rachel.
Zufaellig bin ich auf eure Seite gelandet und muss sagen, dass mir diese vom Design und den Informationen richtig gut gefaellt.
Stephanie Dreyer says
These beautiful posts are my weekly reminders and check-ins of how mindful and present I am being in my life – for myself and my family. I am so grateful to you. I am a better mom because of you.
Rachel Macy Stafford says
Thank you so much, Stephanie! Your faithful support and companionship has been such a blessing to me!
I am sure someone has contacted you about this but it appears pretty clear that your Facebook account has been hacked.
Rachel Stafford says
Thank you so much. I am devastated my page had been stolen from me. I am doing all I can to fix the situation. Please report those vile posts as spam because then you can select “page has been hacked.” This will help me tremendously!
Monika Dig says
Hi Rachel, glad you found out (I sent you an email earlier to let you know about your FB account ). The hacker is still posting bad things on your behalf and I have been selecting “the page had been hacked” for the past 2 hours and nothing seems to be happening.
Praying you can find a way to stop this.
Rachel Stafford says
Thank you so much for diligently reporting the images as spam and then clicking, “they have been hacked.” Facebook has got to listen to us! It is just horrible what the hacker is doing! Please keep reporting. So grateful for your support!
Rachel I keep reporting it and FB sent me a message saying Page not removed as doesn’t violate community standards
But yet they will remove within seconds a photo of a woman breastfeeding
I have reported the page about 10 times with the report “this page has been hacked”
I do not understand fb at all.
I hope you get your lovely page back soon 🙁
I have reported every post as “account has been hacked” and reported some as porn …same message back from FB as the others saying it doesn’t violate their standards. Can’t believe FB hasn’t blocked the hackers out of the account. It will all blow over and I hope it is before they undo anymore of your beautiful work!!!
Rachel Stafford says
Hi sweet Jenny, thank you. I see that the vile postings have stopped. I pray this means FB got the message and at least stopped the postings. Now if I can just get access to my page again, all will be well. Grateful for the support of this community!!!
You’ve got that right Stephanie … A good way to get viewers? I didn’t even click into them when I started seeing them come up as they just didn’t look right for the type of blog it is.
Thank you. Thank you for this post, for all your blog posts, for your journey, and for your book. I was drowning in life, a glorious life with two beautiful kids, a husband I adore, a move to a new job and house that was meant to be for our family, etc., but I was drowning. I came across something of yours, maybe a blog post about your journey, and I thought, “hey, that is me.” Since then, I have been taking your writings and suggestions to heart, and my life, happiness, contentedness, and relationships have improved greatly. Although I am improving, there is so much room for more improvement. I have good periods and periods where I revert back. However, you have given me a second wind of hope that I can be a fake “Take Your Time” parent and spouse and eventually become that person. My heart is smiling for this experience of yours, and I am now invigorated again to pursue a hands on journey even more. It is so nice to read that it is o.k. to be a great actress. I will get there. Thank you again.
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