It’s been a year since my ten-year-old daughter and I started visiting “Annie” at the nursing home. Avery felt compelled to “adopt” Annie when she learned she hadn’t had a visitor in years. In the beginning, Annie smiled all the time and shared fond memories of her past. We would take her to Bingo, paint with her, and Avery would sing to her. Now Avery just sings. On a good day, Annie will hum along to her favorite Elvis song. But mostly, she just listens; the music makes her breathe easier.
I hoped by some small miracle she’d be lucid enough for me to thank her when we visited this week. I wanted to tell her she prepared a little girl to comfort her grandfather in his final days. I’ll never forget how Avery drew close to Grandpa Ben although he looked unfamiliar, sick, and in pain. Avery went right up to his bedside with a big smile. Avery was not scared. She was not scared at all.
She was prepared. And I knew we had Annie to thank for that.
Unfortunately, Annie was incoherent when we arrived on Thursday. We ushered her off to a quiet corner of the nursing home and Avery got out her guitar. The first song she played was “You Alone” – the last song her grandfather heard – the song she played at his funeral, so bravely and boldly in a room full of mourners, her voice strong, never wavering. She was prepared.
As she began to sing to Annie, I felt myself becoming emotional. I will never be able to hear that song without crying. But there she was, singing it with a smile and strong enough to be heard over the noise of the nurses’ station. When she was finished, Annie sat up a little straighter and said the only sentence she'd say while we were there. She said, “I love to sing.”
I felt satisfied Annie knew why we came – to thank her. And I think she was thanking us back.
Annie soon fell asleep and Avery suggested we visit the woman who our cat Paisley curled up with on Pet Day recently. When we stepped into Mama J’s room, she smiled so wide that all her teeth showed. She remembered us and our “little lamb” that comforted her that day. She was delighted to see Avery had a guitar.
“Would you like me to play for you?” Avery asked. Mama J nodded enthusiastically.
As Avery played her grandpa’s song, I could see Mama J’s astonishment, her tears, her joy, her disbelief.
When Avery finished, Mama J explained that she’d been feeling blue all day and had looked for a song on the television to comfort her. “And just look what came through the door! A beautiful child prepared with a song to lift this 96-year-old woman’s heart! Don’t anybody tell me God don’t answer prayers!” she exclaimed.
Prepared
She used that word. And then she said, “Tell your people about this.”
I think she means you.
So I’ve thought long and hard about what this means for you, and I think it is this:
When forced to go outside your comfort zone,
When faced with questions that have no easy answers,
When given a story you didn’t ask for,
When met a battle you never wanted to fight,
Instead of saying things like,
I am suffering.
I am being punished.
I am sick and tired of this.
Say this instead:
I am preparing.
I am preparing to serve an important purpose.
And perhaps one day, you’ll walk right up to something scary, sad, and unfamiliar and you’ll know just what to do. With a voice brave and strong, you’ll deliver a message no one else can deliver. And to those who hear it, it will sound like an anthem of hope, an answered prayer, a blanket of comfort.
Thank you for preparing for that moment.
Something tells me it will be glorious.
*****************************************
Dear friends, I posted this story on The Hands Free Revolution Facebook page yesterday not expecting the amazing response it would receive. I decided to post it here on the blog for those who are not on Facebook. I feel so blessed to share these experience with you. After we said our goodbyes, we heard Mama J shout to no one in particular, “Now that’s what I call LOVE!” I smiled, knowing exactly what book I will be taking to her on our next visit! I am thinking Avery and might read some passages to her. When I wrote ONLY LOVE TODAY, I made every effort to fill it with the affirmations that built up the souls of every special education student I ever taught — affirmations I give my daughters, my husband, my friends and colleagues every day. I bet there are some in there for Mama J and for anyone you know going through a stressful time and needs some “soul-building words.”
After writing the book, I talked to my sister-in-law Stacie about how I could make these affirmations more accessible to people. Together Stacie and I came up with “Made With Love Lunch Notes.” Stacie’s sister-in-law Kristyn of Oliver's Twist designed them. When Stacie sent me the initial designs, I cried. I was reminded of the little square notes my mom left on my pillow on days she worked late. Those written affirmations gave me assurance that I've carried with me my whole life. That is my hope for these little cards. The set includes 25 cards with soul-building words from my new book. They are the perfect size to tuck in a lunchbox, tape on a mirror, lay on a desk, or leave on a driver's seat or pillowcase. Notes come packaged in a 4×6 muslin bag and are blank on the back if you wish to add something more. Click here to purchase & see all twenty-five cards.
Thank you for bringing my words to life through loving actions. I cherish your support and presence more than words can ever express, my friends of The Hands Free Revolution.
My books:
HANDS FREE MAMA
HANDS FREE LIFE
ONLY LOVE TODAY
Purpose from pain. So hard, so worth it. I savor each and every story about this mechanism. Thanks for sharing one of yours.
There it is again, that BrAvery in Avery. What a gift she is to this world, strong little light soldier! And what a gift you are. You have both been prepared to bring this message of love to a world desperately in need of it. It’s amazing to see you walking it out…it gives me such hope. I’m still learning to Only Love Today, but your words continue to encourage me to do so. A message of God sent through your words; they always come at the moment I think “I can’t do this anymore”. But then, this sunshine ray of hope comes beaming through, and it gives me strength. Is it strange to say that a sweet ten year old girl is my hero?! Well, she is. And Avery, keep singing girl, cause that beautiful voice is gonna move mountains.
I can’t wait to read her this message. We love you, Amber, and appreciate the love & support you offer us so generously.
This message brings me such hope today! I love the idea that all the hard things I’m going through are simply preparation for something else.
What a beautiful daughter you have! She has such a bright and amazing spirit, and her example gives me the courage to do hard things, with the hope that I will be prepared when opportunities arise 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing these powerful experiences with us <3
Thank you, Valena!
I had an experience of being prepared years ago that I’d love to share with you. My husband had left and the following year I was feeling very sorry for myself as Valentine’s Day approached. In the midst of this pity party I believe the Lord laid it on my heart to remember my husband’s grandmother, who had lost her husband the previous year and was alone like me. So I decided to bake a cake and take it over to her house and spend Valentine’s Day evening with her.
It was a sweet visit and of course I was glad I had done it, but I was exponentially more glad when just a week later I learned that she had died and I was the last family member to see her alive. The most amazing thing, though, was when I was talking to my husband’s aunt at the funeral home and I was able to share something with her that her mother had said during our Valentine’s Day visit, something that comforted her immensely – I could see the relief flood her face.
I can’t tell you how grateful I was that I had put aside my own sadness to reach out to someone who was hurting, and how thrilled I was to see the Lord use that to provide comfort to yet another person who was hurting. It ended up being one of the most sacred Valentine’s Days I’ve ever experienced.
This is so powerful and beautiful. Thank you, Elizabeth, for choosing love and sharing the result with us.
Rachel, I love this post! What a powerful reframe … we are not being punished, we are being prepared. Thank you for writing, sharing, and living this story. It spoke to me and encouraged me today. <3
Thank you, sweet friend. I love receiving your support! Means so much to me.
Thank you for sharing such an absolutely beautiful story. You are a wonderful mother. You have raised two very caring and special girls. Thank you. You are an inspiration to us all!
You have blessed me with such kind words. Thank you!
Wow. What a beautiful story. Your daughter is really something. You’ve done well, Rachel.
Thank you, dear Laurie. It makes me smile to see your name and face, my friend. You are always so encouraging — and it is NOTICED and APPRECIATED.
I love the little note cards! I have been doing Garth’s “napkin notes” in my daughters’ lunches now for a couple of years. It’s amazing what it does to brighten their day. I will have to buy some of these for a little surprise now and then.
Thank you, Tracie! Garth is one of my favorite people in the world!!! I love that he’s inspired you too!!! Thank you for the feedback on the cards! They are precious.
I just watched the video of Avery singing. I have chills and tears in my eyes. I love that she can sing with her whole heart like that, not caring where she is or who is listening. She has the voice of an angel and her love comes through her song. She has already discovered her God given purpose at her young age, and I am enjoying watching her change the world with that gift.
Thank you, Tracie. This means so much to us. I will share with Avery. Blessings to you, dear one.