New Year’s Eve has never been my favorite holiday. In fact, it’s typically been a tough one for me. I am suspended in the uncomfortable space between TOO MUCH (holiday splurge, anyone?) and NOT ENOUGH (unmet goals, anyone?). I typically feel this overwhelming pressure to begin a New Year overhaul (whether needed or not), put on a cute outfit that never fits the way I want it to, and go out and be social. All I really want to do on New Year’s Eve is wear comfy pants and hold my furry cats, knowing that at some point during the night, I’ll probably cry.
Maybe it’s because I am a deep feeler and goodbyes make me sad.
Maybe it’s because I am a recovering perfectionist/overachiever who still takes her goals a little too seriously.
Maybe it’s because it’s one night where I can feel the passing of time so intensely it hurts.
Maybe it’s because I’ve spent too many years running, planning, expecting, regretting, predicting, overthinking, shaming, and critiquing, and the last thing I need is a holiday designated for intense goal setting.
But that was before—before I saw how PEACE looks on my face.
I’ve decided I’m going to wear peace today, this final day of 2018.
And I’m taking a cue from the lady in the picture,
The one who’s wearing PEACE because she allowed herself to JUST BE.
Never in my whole life have I been able to sit still for any amount of time to solve jigsaw puzzles. It always seemed like a waste of valuable time to search for a piece of cardboard that had just the right pattern, colors, and tabs to fit in an obscure place. But for five consecutive days over the holiday break, that is exactly what I did.
What I found there was hardly a waste.
I found my dad’s aging hands grouping pieces by colors.
I found my mom’s gentle humming soothing my soul.
I found my daughter’s laugh chasing away any feelings of unease that tried to creep in.
What I found for the first time in decades was PEACE within –-
That I was enough even when I was not being “productive,”
That I was enough even though my pants felt a bit too snug from holiday indulgence,
That I was enough regardless of unmet goals and unchecked to-do lists,
That I was enough simply because I made myself available to LOVE and BE LOVED.
On my kitchen table were 500 puzzle pieces scattered in a million different directions. They simply needed time and attention to become whole again.
Quite like us, my friends.
When we stop running from ourselves, we detect negative patterns and damaging habits.
When we stop running from ourselves, we see where there are holes and gaps.
When we stop running from ourselves, we become aware of what needs to be healed, restored, and resolved.
When we stop running from ourselves, our heart speakers open up, drowning out the world’s opinions and demands.
When we stop running from ourselves, we are gathered from a thousand different directions to experience a sense of wholeness we thought we’d never know.
During Christmas of 2018, I was blessed with ‘Puzzle Peace.’
And that is how I will approach this final day of the year that normally creates angst for me.
Because when you look at today as a chance to JUST BE,
Rather than an unachievable expectation or an exhausting hurdle,
suddenly you can breathe.
And once you can breathe, you are able to sit down at the table.
Wrapped around your right-brain tendencies, your painful scars, your endearing flaws, and your secret dreams is the exquisite headband your daughter gave you for Christmas. You have this look in your eyes says, I believe I am enough, even if I don’t find a single piece of the puzzle today. Blue is your color, and PEACE becomes you.
Dear ones, no matter what your New Year’s Eve plan looks like, whether it be:
clinking glasses with friends…
kissing someone new or someone you’ve known forever…
playing games with your kids…
chauffeuring around your beloveds who can’t yet drive…
looking at the stars and missing a section of your heart…
or wearing stretchy pants with your four-legged pals,
This is my advice:
Don’t get ahead of yourself – stay right here.
Don’t get lost in the past – stay right here.
Just BE HERE NOW.
Let those three commanding words instantaneously gather you from a thousand different places and wrap you in stillness.
Focus only on the precious Piece of Now you hold in your hands.
It’s the perfect way to end
Dear Friends of the Hands Free Revolution: One of my greatest gifts of 2018 and quite possibly my life was creating and participating in SOUL SHIFT. What began as an 8-week online course to release old, destructive habits and damaging baggage quickly became a close-knit family where healing was abundant, hope was tangible, and positive habits emerged. Participants of SOUL SHIFT learned to respond to themselves, their loved ones, and their challenges in new, healing ways; this led to an inner peace many had never known. My SOUL SHIFT family embraced me as a fellow participant, making space for me to learn and grow alongside them. For the first time in my life, I was able to stop running from the stillness. The feelings I feared would surface in the stillness were not ones to avoid, as I had previously thought. They were protective and enlightening, guiding me to my truest and healthiest path. I can't wait to begin another session of soul-shifting discoveries in just a few weeks.
If you’ve been quietly hurting, wondering if it’s too late to ditch destructive habits and create new pathways to soul-centered joy, connection, and peace, I'm here to tell you … as long as you're still breathing, it’s not. A new session of SOUL SHIFT begins on 1/21. Early registration opens on 1/7. If you’d like to learn more about my course and have the opportunity to sign up at the early-bird discount price on 1/7, please click here.
If you would like a wearable reminder to show up for the sacred moments of your life in 2019, please consider the BE HERE NOW paper bead bracelet made with recycled and sustainable materials by my talented friend Merilee in Honolulu. They are made with 100% Aloha!
My friends, thank you for all the love and support you gave me this year. I never want to walk a single day of this journey without you.