But there’s gold in the dirt, I never took the time to see
But I knew of its worth when you walked beside of me
And my hand fit in yours like a bird would find the breeze.”
-Dermot Kennedy, Giants
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was the eleven-year-old dog who lives at the home studio where I recorded the audio book for Hands Free Mama. I knew being asked to record a six-year-old book was highly unusual, so I paid attention. When I greeted the brown and white dog at the door, the producer said, “Since you recorded here last, Rusty had major surgery on his leg. One day, he blew out a tendon. I thought, oh, 2020… don’t take my dog, too.’ But as you can see, he’s doing great. Just started climbing the stairs last week.”
As I followed the man and his beloved dog up the stairs to the recording booth, I had to blink back my tears.
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was the Taco Bell drive-through employee giving us free Baja Blast Freeze. Getting Avery’s favorite treat after her tennis practice had become a summer ritual—as was tossing a dollar into the tip container and thanking them for great service.
“The drink is on us today,” the familiar employee said, her eyes smiling behind her mask.
“Are you serious?” I said, as my daughter and I looked at each other in awe.
“It’s like we’ve become friends,” Avery said happily as we pulled away.
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was having a nightmare and remembering that I have someone I can tell these horrible dreams to and she’ll help me release them.
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was my friend sending me a new song called “Banks.” I took it out for a walk, and when I heard the chorus, I had to stop in my tracks and give thanks for music that heals and friends that don't let us drown.
“If you ever feel like you are not enough
-Needtobreathe
I'm gonna break all your mirrors
I wanna be there when the darkness closes in
To make the truth a little clearer
I wanna hold you close but never hold you back
I'll be the banks for your river.”
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was telling my kids I started therapy and why. When one of them said, “but you don’t look like someone with those issues,” I knew it was the most important thing they could ever know about me.
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was receiving an audio message from Alice Kajoina and her family. To Avery, they sang both the American and the African version of “Happy birthday To You.” The harmony made by this special family and the look of joy my daughter’s face brought me to tears.
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was watching Natalie cook down strawberries to make a homemade strawberry cake for her sister’s birthday. “Pandemic birthdays are hard,” she acknowledged, having had one herself in June.
Suddenly, I remembered watching my mom and her sister making strawberry jam together over my aunt’s kitchen stove. Their heads were close, like they were talking their own sister language.
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was hearing from a friend that she received the card I sent upon the second anniversary of her husband’s passing. She was going to take the card with her to her oncology appointment since she had to go alone. She said, “I’m going to read it and say my prayers while I wait for the doctor.”
“What’s lifting you today?”
Today, it was cleaning out my bathroom drawer and finding my beloved Winnie the Pooh watch that I wore in the 90’s. I wore it to remember the care-free part of me that once loved to climb trees and take her sweet time coming back down to earth.
What’s lifting you today? That is the question I ask myself when my heart begins to race or my mind feels cloudy and overwhelmed. It’s far too easy to become consumed by what is bringing us down right now.
And I was there—in the depths—for quite some time when I asked for help. And for the past few months, getting help enabled me to recognize someone I love needed help too.
“Sometimes the people who appear most strong, happy, and stable have the hardest time asking for help—but it’s not weak to ask for help; it’s brave,” I explained to this precious soul.
What’s lifting me today?
Two things are constant: 1) my on-going blessing list where I document names of people who are hurting in a rainbow of colors, and 2) playing a morning round of ‘Banjo ball.’
Last week, when the palms of my hands became so cracked, itchy, and red that it hurt to write down blessings or toss the ball, I reminded myself: “It’s brave to ask for help. You don’t have to figure this out on your own.”
I sought professional guidance to find out what was wrong with my hands.
The doctor prescribed a strong ointment that I was instructed to apply each night before putting on a pair of gloves. I wondered where in the world I’d find gloves in the month of August in the South, but alas, they were found in Target’s beauty section—and they were a pretty color, too.
That night, I applied the ointment and put on my gloves, as instructed. (I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t even question the absurdity of 2020 anymore.)
As I crawled into bed, a worry popped up in my mind. I took a deep breath and asked myself the question: What’s lifting you today?
I didn’t know, so I reached for Grace Ann Shaw's poetry book, HEAVY CROWNS, that I’ve been reading before I go to sleep.
As I held my book with gloved hands, I started to laugh… and then came the tears.
God sure has a sense of humor, I thought to myself.
I recently chose to use this unusual time in history as an opportunity to create new, healing practices for my life. This process is requiring some heavy lifting—but there, right in front of my eyes, was divine confirmation that I do not have to figure it out by myself.
I can’t see it, but healing is happening below the surface.
I feel unprepared, but I am equipped.
I feel pain, but I am protected.
The weight is heavy, but I do not carry it alone.
Every time I share what’s unexpectedly lifting me, like cat tricks or therapy or recording a book I wrote six years ago, people say, “I needed to hear that.”
Like the neighbors who stopped me the other night while out for a bike ride to tell me how much they enjoyed the unexpected video of Banjo playing ball.
I could be mistaken, but I swear the man’s eyes glistened when he said it was just the message he needed.
In that moment, I was grateful I asked for help … because when we lift ourselves, we lift each other.
My friends, it may not seem like a good time to put on gloves… or teach a cat a new trick… or look for Sparks of Life, but I encourage you to try.
I have an extra pair of gloves; we can do the heavy lifting together.
No matter how self-sufficient we’ve been up to this point, we simply can’t walk this road alone—
Not one more step.
My hand in yours,
Rachel
* Please join me for an updated version of my popular 8-week online series. The upcoming session is called Soul Shift LIFT, and it’s more doable and encouraging than ever, with a focus on personal and relational tools you can use to lift yourself and those you love during these difficult times. This shame-free, hope-filled journey can offer real help and real encouragement to you right now. Instead of pushing ourselves through the hard days ahead, let’s learn how to lift and love ourselves through them. Registration closes in one week. Get all the details by clicking here. Thank you for your love & support of my work & my heart.
